Is that a P or a B?

Interestingly enough, I spend a good part of talking with Bishop correcting the letter he is using to say a work. For example, when he says chip, he often will use an s sound, which is normal for little kiddos, but I always say something to the point of, "Chips, that's right. CH-ips." So most of our conversations include me repronouncing what he has just said to me.

This morning was no different. He was standing on my bed, talking to me, wearing just his pj pants while I was changing. He was chatting away, and said what I heard as "Mommy's poops". To which I automatically chimed in with, "Mommy's poops? What do you mean? There's no poop in Mommy's bedroom" (I was slightly concerned that he was admitting to something that I had yet to discover). Bishop answered, slightly annoyed that I was questioning him when he had already moved on to another subject, "No, Mommy's poops. See?" At this point, he walked over to where I was standing and started patting my chest.

"Poops? See mommy? Poops."

In my mind I am thinking...poops? Poops...poops...wait? Boobs? Is he talking about my boobs?

So I ask him, "Bishop, do you mean Mommy's boobs?"

Bishop- "Yeah, mommy's poops."

"No, buddy, it's a B, like B-ishop. B-oo-bs" (it hadn't really occured to me what I was explaining at this point, or helping him learn to say).

Bishop- "Bishop? OHhhhhhhh, Bishop's Boobs."

Then he started patting his own stomach. "See Mommy? Bishop's Boobs!! Bishop Boobs!"

Oh lord. Where did I go wrong. We always put things into perspective of who is going to have to explain to his Sunday school teacher why he is saying what he is saying. This one is definitely on me.

Give me the milk, or the dog gets it.

At the age of 3, Bishop has a slight addiction. Well, actually, in addition to his others, he has recently decided that he needs chocolate milk. Daily. This isn't such a big deal, but the kid just won't leave me alone until I get his chocolate milk. He usually starts pestering me at the most inconvient moments. Like while I am outside mowing the lawn. Or taking a shower. Or going to the bathroom. I think he can tell when I am otherwise occupied, and likes to come up with reasons to be the center of attention again. So I will be up to my elbows in baby poop or doing dishes and he starts in.

"Mommy, I want chocolate milk."

"Ok, Bishop, hang on one sec"

"Mommy, I chocolate milk, please" (which actually sounds like 'peas')

"Ok Bishop, hang on"

"Please Mommy!! Chocolate milk, please!!"

"Ok, just let me..."

"PLEASE MOMMY! Chocolate milk PLEASE?! Please, Mommy!!!"

(Clearly the kid thinks I am waiting for him to ask 'nicely' so he keeps adding more 'please's)

"OK! Bishop! Mommy needs to finish this, and then I will get your chocolate milk"

"CHOCOLATE MILK, MOMMY!!! Please, please, please?"

There is just no reasoning with him at this point. He is usually pulling on whatever appendage he can get a hold of (arm, leg, clothing...hair. Ok, he has never pulled my hair, but if it came between him and his chocolate milk, I wouldn't put it past him) to get me to go get him some chocolate milk.

I am not a huge fan of juice. It is just a bunch of sugar, and the boy does NOT need the extra energy. So he more often than not has water, with the occasional chocolate milk tossed in. Thus the begging. This same situation happens if he knows we have Capri Suns in the fridge. Strangely enough, I noticed that on his chocolate milk packaging, it says it has 25% less sugar. Which makes me wonder, less than what?

The normal chocolate milk? A competitors chocolate milk? A bag of sugar?

Daydreaming at...Fred Meyers?

That's right. It happened. And I am not ashamed to admit it on a public forum (clearly). I have been watching a couple kids in my house this week, and I needed a break. From being home, as well as from kids and, well, everything really. The problem with retail therapy, at least at a grocery store, is that most of it is off limits to me at this point in my gallbladder-less life.

If you don't want to hear me complain, now would be the time to check out.

I MISS FOOD!!!

It's not that I don't eat, but I just eat basically the same things all the time. Because I know they are safe. So I haven't done a ton of branching out, and I am soooo bored with food. I want a big hamburger. With hamburger. Or....hmmmmm I could go on a tangent. Like cake. And ice cream. And cheese. Lots of cheese. And real milk. Yum.

So anyways, needing a break, and being fresh out of the crackers that I can eat, I decided to head on down to Freddy's to get a new box. That's right. All the way to the store for a box of crackers.

Understand, though, that they are some of the only 'snacks' that are ok. They have 2 grams of fat per serving. I can recite the amount of fat in all the food I eat. And the serving size. It's a sad life.

So, I get to Freddys, get my crackers, and then I decide to wander a bit. You know, bask in the large amount of food there, and daydream. I wandered the candy/cookie aisles for...20 minutes? Trying to decide if I wanted to risk it. I stared at the cookie section, because I REALLY wanted some cookies. Like...shortbread cookies with chocolate. Or Milanos. Or...geez, really, any cookie that is big and good and had chocolate of some kind.

How sad is that? Pretty sad, in retrospect. I basically stood, imagining what they would taste like, as people walked by, grabbed what they wanted, and bought it. No doubt going home and eating as many as they wanted, not thinking anything of it. *sigh* So I stood and daydreamed.

Then I would wander to the candy aisle, though I didn't spend as much time there, since I am really not craving candy. Just cookies.

I spent about an hour in the store. And I bought? Crackers. I realized as I stood there that I hadn't really eaten today. Not a real meal, just like pieces of things as I fed the kiddos. All day. So I was really hungry, and I decided to just eat at home. So I made a sandwich. And had some of my crackers. So I going to drink some water and go to bed.

Ok. It's not ALL bad. For example, I am alive. That's a pretty big deal. Even if it means I have to be careful about what I eat and constantly feel slightly sick. I am usually pretty optimistic about the whole deal. But every now and then I need to complain. So that's my complaint. I just miss eating whatever and not feeling bad (but literally...bad=sick).

OCD

I have lots of theories about life in general and people in specific. I have never really thought of myself as an obsessive person; though I have had some moments with my children. Eventually I realized that it really doesn't make that big of a difference if things don't happen in the exact right order for them to be happy and well adjusted. Cadence is going to have a much easier go of it than Bishop (clearly the first child, and therefore, everything was done by the book with him). A small example? She get's her diaper changed wherever. I think Bishop had his diaper changed a solid 4 times off the changing table in his diapering years. I was a purist like that.

At this point, I am happy to get us all out of the house on time, and clothed weather appropriately. Even if Bishop is not wearing the 'outfit' that came all together from the store. That was a revelation for me. How silly, right? That I always put him in the exact same outfits and didn't really 'mix' it up till well after his 1st birthday. And that was only because they don't make the whole outfit thing for older toddlers. This is not at all how I dress, so I am not sure why I thought that was how kids need to dress. Whatever.

There are specific orders to how I do things, but I like to think I am flexible...while knowing that I am, in fact, not. Last week Bishop was helping me make his PB&J sandwich, and he started putting the jam on first. Which is not how I do it. And the jam was on the left piece of bread.

You may not know this, but the proper way is to put peanut butter on the left slice of bread, then wipe off the knife, then jam on the right side. And you don't mix up the order or the bread slices. EVER.

I also never wash my face before I am done washing my hair in the shower. This one seems pretty logical to me. If I wash my face, then wash the conditioner out of my hair, and it gets on my face...it is dirty again. Because conditioner feels slimy which = dirty. Anyways, I always wash my hair first, then start at the top of my head (face) and wash down. It's the shower 'trickle down' theory.

So I had to catch myself last week before I lectured Bishop about why the peanut butter needed to go first, and on the left piece of bread. You will be happy to know I let him finish his sandwich without even switching the bread slice sides.

SO what are your compulsive things? We all have them. It is either just the way we were taught to do things, or it is an order we have taught ourselves. How do you make a PB&J sandwich? Do you lick the knife? Not wipe if off at all?

Gah. I am just going to pretend everyone does it the right way.

The nudist colony

I realize that I blog about my children (particularly my son) far more than I do anything else. I was trying to decide what else I should talk about, and I realized...as a stay at home mom, my kids tend to be my day. So I guess it is okay for me to mention them so much. With that in mind-

How did I end up with 2 wanna be nudists? I say wanna be because they aren't allowed to be. At least, not in public. It is rough when I go to check the mail, and Bishop runs out in his underwear. Or in a shirt...and no underwear. <--- That was worse than the just underwear one. It's funny because he starts the day off dressed, and it seems to be a natural process that by lunch, he is down to just underwear, or the underwear has gone missing. After nap, we start out clothed again, and when Zach gets home, he is usually down to a tshirt and underwear.

Cadence has started complaining about her clothes. I am hoping she doesn't learn to undress for a LONG time. Does that make me a bad parent? I don't think so. When Bishop was in diapers, I NEVER let him see how I took them off, mainly by distracting him. So I never really had issues with him taking his diapers off. Pants are just too easy. The second we get home from somewhere, his socks and shoes get taken off (he has figured out how to 'toe' off his shoes, no hands needed!!), then, he goes potty and usually puts his pants in an obscure place, so I can't find them. Then his shirt magically disappears while he is playing, and the next thing I know, he comes out naked.

He also fakes injuries to get out of trouble. Primarily to his pinky finger. I have a hard time believing his pinky gets hurt that often. Now I am off to put his clothes back on him for nap time. Just another day in the nudist colony...I mean, Ivey house.

Kiss?

It is incredible to me what a kiss will do for a toddler. Really, any owie is suddenly better when it has been kissed by mom. I feel like there could be some really deep theological discussion inserted here about how faith in what we are told/know/God caring for us...things along those lines. But I am not in a theological mood at the moment.

Because my son has recently been asking for us to kiss him...in inappropriate places. Not for any reason, other than he had been hurt there. Yesterday, during one of his birthday parties, he followed me around for several minutes, trying to take off his pants so I could kiss his owie on his bottom better. I had to tell him several times that mommy wasn't going to kiss it. It didn't make sense in his 3 year old mind that mommy wouldn't make something better when it was clearly in her power to do so. The best incident happened about a month ago.

Zach was playing with Bishop in the living room, and Bishop somehow injured himself...so he went up to Zach, pulled his pants down, and said "Kiss?" and he didn't want a kiss on the bottom, if you get what I am saying.

Yet another incident of us falling over laughing while Bishop stands off to the side wondering what the heck is going on.

We have also had to start limiting what movies exactly that he is watching. We knew the day would eventually come, as he mimics what he hears, and we don't really want to be called to the toddler Sunday school because he told someone to F off or something like that. So clearly, most action type movies were out. Recently, we have discovered romantic comedy is off limits too. As he doesn't get that there is an appropriate way to kiss, and an inappropriate way. So he sees people on a movie kissing...and wrestling... and he promptly comes over, sits on my lap, and tries to kiss me. Ahem, really kiss me.

So. Movies limited-check.

There are many things that I expected when we decided to have kids. But trying to explain the difference between kissing and the inappropriateness of kissing your mom with tongue to my toddler was no actually on the list. I think Cadence is going to be super easy because we will already be savvy to all the strange things kids pull.

French kissing attempts included.

So, I made my first foray into homemade baby food. Which...is surprisingly easy...

Actually, my mom has told me for years that she always made all of our baby food, that is was no big deal, that sort of thing. But the little jars are darn easy, if ridiculously overpriced. And here's why. So babies usually start eating around 6 months of age. And this is good to get them used to eating. But all the eating that they do until they are one is just complimentary eating...meaning that their diet really should be breast milk/formula and then toss in a food for them to try. However, they shouldn't be substituting a nursing time for a feeding time until they are older. Much older than 6 months. So the idea that I need to pay for those little jars of baby food...which are nasty as can be, seems pretty silly. Though, to be honest, I jumped right on board with Bishop.

This time around...I decided to try out the homemade version. I feel like I have become this uber-crunchy momma who uses cloth diapers and only feeds her baby homemade organic food. Don't get me wrong, I love the earth; but I love to save money more. Call me cheap, but I can spend a dollar on sweet potatoes and feed my child for over a week instead of 2 days. Seems like a no-brainer to this thrifty mom. So when considering making homemade baby food, I went to my always there when I need it guide-

The internet. Bet you thought I would say my mom. Not that I think she did it wrong or anything, but I like reading lots of how-to's before I just hop into something. So after some extensive study, I found a pretty awesome baby food making site. So I jumped in.

Well, actually, I went to WalMart first, but THEN I jumped right in. This is what I needed-

Ice cube trays

Ziplock freezer bags

sweet potatoes

tin foil

food processor

And thats it, actually. I washed the potatoes, put some fork holes in them, ran them under the water again, then wrapped them in tin foil. I baked them at 410 for about 45 minutes. Let them cool a tad, unwrapped them, cut them out of their skins like I do an avocado, tossed them in the food processor (which my mother in law bought me when Bishop was born for just this purpose...it's a mini version). I thinned mine down a tad. You can use breast milk, formula, or water. I didn't make mine very thin, knowing that I will probably thin it more when it comes time for Cadence to eat it.

Out of the food processor and into the ice cube trays. Each ice cube portion is about a tablespoon. Anyways, popped them into the freezer after wrapping the trays in saran wrap. Let them freeze nice and hard, popped them out and into a ziplock bag. Labeled the bag (frozen baby food is good for about a month) and tossed it back in the freezer.

And just like that, I got a big Crafty-Crunchy Momma star. You are welcome, Earth.